Paying respect to the Sun
Field Notes 20260515 - Friday
Finished up my weekly morning physical training with a 12 mile run early this morning. Fridays are for long and easy runs, today’s pace surprised me as it’s more or less maintaining closer to my faster and shorter runs of the week. This only means one thing: I’m not running hard enough, time to open it up more and keep pushing my efficiency.
It is that brief and wonderful time of the year where the temperature is mild or even a little cold at 5 AM but the Sun is out earlier and shining more vigorously. My routes take me all over the place but my favorite stretches are local trails which are lined with mature trees. The sun breaks through them, casting long and beautiful shadows.
I feel like a groggy flying insect during Spring as the orange and gold illuminations cast through the trees and on the ground make me instinctively seek them out. For especially longer durations of this I will often close my eyes and face the sun with open palms, feeling the life-giving radiation soak through my skin.
I know I’m not the first person in the world to appreciate the Sun. Since I was a young boy I’ve instinctively paid respect to the sun, as most children do. It’s the most obvious and natural realization anyone can make, that none of this exists here without the seemingly raging ball of plasma suspended in the deep, dark void. Yet as we grow old we often forget, distracted by a myriad of things that literally do not matter at all.
Afternoon
- Sun: Taurus 25°
- Moon: Taurus 11° | Waning Crescent
Meditation
- 30 Minutes.
- Expand App, timer section, F18.
While I only had 30 minutes for this session with plans to attempt a deeper altered state after a brief break, it still ended up kind of weird. Moving through prep and setup was fine and without anything dramatic. Settling in focus states wasn’t an issue but since the 12 mile run this morning it took a bit to regain awareness between shifting my awareness.
I had one goal, to get to F18 (heart energy) and cast a query that’s been on my mind all week: “Show me what is being initiated. Show me the wand.” It’s a long story, part of an ongoing exploration that I will pull together at some point. That point has simply not arrived yet as I’m still deep in this particular thread-pulling situation.
I was loosely aware of my time and realized that F12 (expanded awareness) is all I had time for. I settled in and may or may not have cast the query before the alarm went off and I abruptly had to close the session. This really isn’t that big of an issue but I do like to cleanly close meditations because that is when I express my gratitude, which I believe to be (arguably) the most important part of it all.
After the brief interruption I laid down again in an attempt to induce a deeper and immersive altered state, such as a lucid dream or successful “threshold hunting” which I use as springboards into projections. No success, just groggy from going in and out of consciousness. I’m not claiming that this doesn’t also happen during my more typical sessions but I’m beginning to see a loose trend.
Oftentimes an altered state forms after a solid meditation. Other than whatever my goal is I always feel more power after a good meditation. Inadvertently, or literally by design, this is where I initiate protective measures, align my awareness, and gather energy. All of this immediately transfers into the next stage of the sessions.
Today was simply not the day and that’s okay. When thinking about “did I or did I not” complete my goal of casting a query during this afternoon’s trance I’m not sensing any negative feelings about it. I think because it’s been on my mind since Monday we can safely assume that the query was cast anyway, somehow. I could write more here as to the other reason I feel at peace about it but, as I’ve stated earlier, the time has not come to talk about that (yet).
